Julie Taymor, director of the new Beatles-fueled musical film Across The Universe, reminds me of a cute, freshman art school student who recently finished reading a book on the 60’s and is really “interested” in it. Oh, you know the 60’s! There was rock and roll with, like, Jimi Hendrix! And Janis Joplin (who drank a lot!) and um, they all took drugs! And rode on a bus! Oh wait, there was also, like, a lot of protesting! and Vietnam! And they all wore super cool clothes. Oh and do you know what her faaaavorite band is? THE BEATLES OMG! “Hey Jude” is THE best song ever!!!
You sit there and listen to her tell you about it because she’s pretty good looking, but you hope that if you stay long enough, wading through the bullshit, maybe she’ll make out with you soon enough. But she never does.
Taymor, though, is way past the age of 19 and has no excuse for making such a forced depiction of that decade, especially since she actually lived through the ‘60s. Made up of what could have been music videos for upcoming artists, the movie follows remnants of a “love story” plot, taped together with laughable dialogue taken directly from Lennon/McCartney lyrics. When the film Moulin Rouge quoted lyrics (Love is like oxygen! All you need is love!), they did so with a wink to the audience. Here, though, characters are dead serious when saying, “‘Where’d she come from?’ ‘Oh she came through the bathroom window.’” or “I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together…I get it!”
All I wanted was love, love, love, Miss Taymor, and all I got was golden slumbers. ( OH SNAP DID YOU SEE WHAT I JUST DID THERE?!? ZING!)
Sigh…Goo Goo G'joob.
-Published in The Rutgers Review October 2007
